Men who are predictable are boring, says dating expert Carlos Xuma. Men who truly want to be successful in flirting with girls need to mix it up a little and actually send women some mixed signals, he says.
It’s not playing games or being deceptive, it’s all about men learning how to keep it hot, sexy, and interesting for both of them, Mr. Xuma says in a recent report that includes tips on how to keep women wondering.
“The beauty of these tips is that many of them can work on a very small level, say when a man has just met a woman and they are getting to know each other and then later on down the road, when a guy is in longer-term relationship,” Mr. Xuma says. “A lot of guys forget that they have to maintain attraction and continue to attract women even once the relationship is on solid ground.”
In the new report, Mr. Xuma reveals that sending mixed signals makes a woman not entirely sure of a man’s intentions and this stirs up her passion and lust.
He says that occasionally a man needs to act aloof. “Men can use this strategy during their first-ever conversation with a girl and can also use it if they have been dating for months. What he wants to do is act a little aloof or mysterious for a bit of time. This means he can possibly go silent for a portion of the conversation or ignore her or focus on something else for awhile,” Mr. Xuma says. “They key is to not do it very long. Just for a little bit of time and only occasionally.”
Another way to keep it spicy and hot when a man wants to flirt with women is for him to occasionally do something completely out of character, Mr. Xuma says. For instance, if he never eats Thai food, he should suggest they have that for dinner. Anything that takes the woman off guard or surprises her will work, he says.
“A guy should try to shatter her expectations,” Mr. Xuma says. “When a man shows a woman he isn’t as consistent as she thinks, he keeps the attraction fired up. When a woman thinks she knows everything about a guy and how he will react at all times it becomes boring. Boring kills attraction and sex appeal.”